Mibu Saints
by Leila Winters
Summary: au Hajime & Aoshi are brothers who are driven to kill, believing they have God's permission. Tokio, Meg & Sano dragged into it. Kenshin investigating murders. Chap 8: betrayal & violence. [ST, AMeg] Rated for language, adult situations, violence.
1. Meet the Saints

**_Writer's Note:_**  Forgive the bad jokes and crude humor.  This is a parody of the movie _Boondock Saints, _a great rated-R flick sporting Sean Patrick Flannery and Norman Reedus—two very sexy boys adopting Irish accents.  (but this is also a self-contained story, so you don't need to have seen the movie to read this.)  Hope ya'll enjoy.

**_Disclaimer:_**  Don't own _Boondock Saints_ OR _Rurouni Kenshin_.  Both are works of art which someone like me could never conceive of on their own.

_Mibu Saints_ by Leila Winters

            The Lady's Church of Holy Suffering and Stigmata was solemn as Minister Anji told his tale.  Creaks in the pews were muted by Anji's booming voice as he said:

            "Sakaiya was walking home after school when a car pulled up.  They dragged Sakaiya to the corner and proceeded to beat her.  No one called the police.  People just watched as Sakaiya was stabbed to death in broad daylight!"

            Heads turned as a light patter of feet from the back was heard…lazily making their way toward the pulpit.

            "Sakaiya's murderers walk, justice not served and a family seeking retribution!"

            Near the front of the church's pulpit and still slowly walking, were two men in identical blue jeans, close-fitting black shirts and knee-length black overcoats.  As the minister continued talking, he glanced at the cold grey-blue and amber eyes…and shuddered.  Lady's Church of Holy Suffering and Stigmata would be glad to be rid of them.

            Beyond the minister they walked, to the life-size statue of Lord Jesus Christ crucified.  Each placing a hand on the Lord's feet, they bent and kissed his toes.  And on each of those hands…a mark.  The left one had kanji tattooed across the back and index finger; on his trigger hand, was "Aku soku zan;" and the right one almost in an identical fashion, was "Honor through Strength."

            When they had righted themselves, they strolled towards the back of the church, effectively ignoring the minister's sermon.

            "We all must fear bad men, but there is another kind we must fear.  Another kind whose threat to society may destroy any helpful establishment—and that is the _indifference _of good men!"

            Outside of the church, both men paused to examine their surroundings.  In sync, they pulled black leather gloves on their trademark hands, slipped shades on their clear eyes, and lit up cigarettes.  The slightly larger of the two turned to his partner.

            "Well now, you think the old man finally got today's sermon right?"

            "Aa," the other man said, his impassive voice holding just a hint of a smile, "I would say so."

            [cue music]

Meat Packing Plant

East Side

Mardi Gras

Kondou was taking a few notes on his little clipboard when he approached the two men working diligently, cutting away the fat on slabs of meat.

            "Aoshi, Hajime, I want you to meet someone.  She's new here, so you'll be training her in.  Boys, do meet Miss Misao Makimachi," leaning in a bit closer and adopting a conspirital tone, the old man said, "The group representing big, fat lesbians has been getting on my case about my hiring stats, so try to go easy on her, okay?"

            Thin lips curved into a smirk and Hajime gave his boss a slight nudge, "Mm, while we're hiring big, fat lesbians, why don't you give your ma a call?"

            "Fuck you."

            "Not on your best day, sir."

            Behind the aging man was a short, skinny, tough-looking girl.  Her long black hair was tied in a severe braid and when Aoshi extended a hand to her, she merely lifted a defiant chin to reveal the words "Untouched by man" on the underside of her throat.

            He faltered slightly, but Aoshi said easily, "It is a pleasure to meet you, Misao."

            Giving him a dirty look, "I prefer to be called Makimachi by _men._"

            Hajime laughed.  "Oh yes, of course.  All right, watch closely.  The rule of thumb here—"

            Green eyes flashed.  "Wait a minute!  Rule of thumb?  Did you know that in the early 1900's, it was legal for men to beat their wives? …as long as they used a stick no wider than their thumb."  In disgust, she gave him a shove, her small stature surprisingly of no consequence.

            Seeing Hajime's eyes narrow dangerously, Aoshi gave his brother a warning look.

            The man proceeded to examine his gloved thumb.  "Well, you can't really do much damage with that, now can you?  Suppose it had been the rule of wrist…"

            "Hajime," Aoshi admonished.

            "…I don't suppose many women would have survived disobeying their husbands."

            "_Hajime_."

            "Say, Aoshi, how many spindly weasel lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?"

            "…"

            "One weasel girl to actually screw in the light bulb and one little lesbian to suck my cock, while I supervise!"

            The expected outburst came.  The small girl growled in her throat, gritting out, "I knew you two pricks would give me problems—give me shit 'cause I'm a woman.  Well, let me tell you something, I'm tired of your male dominance _bullshit_!"

            Trying to make peace, Aoshi stepped in front of his offensive brother.  "It's Mardi Gras, a New Orleans drinking day.  We are just having a bit of fun."

            "DO I LOOK AMERICAN TO YOU, _FUCK_FACE??"

            The larger man stepped in front of the other man, "Don't you talk to my brother like that, you man-hating bitch!"

            In retaliation, the girl took a step back and kicked Hajime Saitou Omitsu as hard as she could in the nuts.  "I'LL TALK HOWEVER I LIKE, JERK!!  —OOF!"

            Knocked flat on her back, Misao Makimachi looked at the man glowering dangerously above her.  He was giving his fist a little rub.

            Misao looked incredulously at those cold grey-blue eyes.  _Did he just punch me??  IN THE FACE??_

            Kondou took one look at Misao sprawled on the floor, Aoshi standing over her, and Hajime curled into a ball, two women hovering over him.  "Shit."

            _And upstairs, God laughed because all was as it should be._

            "Hajime!  Are you okay?"  Megumi, who had been training to be a nurse, tried to pry the man's hand from his crotch.

            "Oh, Hajime…"  Tokio placed the man's head in her lap, his face still in a grimace of pain, and stroked his hair soothingly.

            This made the weasel lesbian very angry.  "What are you guys doing??  Get away from him!  Women.  Always catering to the needs of men.  Get the fuck up!!"

            Aoshi offered a hand to the girl.  "I apologize for hitting you, but I will not forgive you for hurting my brother so easily."

            "OH, FUCK YOU!"  Misao's eyes fell on Hajime's fallen form.  "AND FUCK YOU, TOO!!"

            Aoshi merely stared at her, blinking calmly.  "Fucken dyke."

            _God rewound the tape and played it back, letting out a chuckle.  He had a plan for Hajime Saitou and Aoshi Shinomori Omitsu—fraternal twins whose place in the cosmic scale of things probably extended beyond Oprah's._

_            Oh, it would be interesting.  And with that, God smiled fondly at his kin._

**Writer's Note**:  Sorry about the short introduction, guys.  This might end up being a short-chapter type fic.  But I'll be sure to keep it interesting.

Oh yes.  And I DO apologize for the language.  I know some people get offended by that kind of stuff, but language is really an integral part of everyone's life and I always think it's nice to include.

LAST THING:  Sorry for making everyone OOC.  ^_^  I just find it amusing.


	2. Witness the Saints in all their Glory

**_Writer's Note_**:  Um…yeah.  Had so much fun writing this, I guess I could care less what anyone else thinks.  (But it's always a nice bonus when people enjoy it.  ^_^)  Do bear with it.  The story actually goes somewhere.  I swear.

**_Disclaimer:  _**Already made my claims in the first chapter, so now I don't ever have to worry about that again.  Whoo hoo.

_Mibu Saints_ by Leila Winters

Dilapidated Omitsu Apartment

Still Mardi Gras

Hajime Saitou Omitsu sat on the couch, completely naked, and lowered an ice pack onto his groinal area—a slow, tortured breath escaping his lips.  "What a bitch…"

Aoshi finished discarding his clothes, both brothers quite heedless of their own nudity and walked to the shower.  His back revealed a large, intricate tattoo of a dragon…a mirror image of one on the back of his brother.

Speaking around the cigarette in his mouth and turning off the water, Aoshi muttered to himself, "No fucken hot water…"

Hajime smiled.  "Shinomori, you really should consider opening up in public the way you do at home.  I'm sure the ladies would find it very…alluring."

Aoshi gave his brother a cold look.  "Do not call me by my middle name, _Saitou._"

That earned him a dirty look.

Just then, the phone rang and Hajime, carefully balancing his ice pack with one hand, leaned over and picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hajime, that you?" a voice chimed.

"Yes, Mother, this is Hajime."

"Ohh!  What are my boys up to?  Stayin' out of trouble?"

"Yes, Ma."

"Oh…"  there was an uneasy pause.  "Is Aoshi doing all right?"

"Is everything all right, Ma?  You sound upset."

Aoshi stepped closer.  "What's going on?"

"Shut up.  I can't fucken hear."

Heavy breathing hung on the other line.  "Why did I ever have you boys?  You cause me nothing but trouble…always takin' to scrappin'…you ruined my girlish figure in one fell swoop and then you sucked me dry!  My tits are hangin' down to my ankles for Christ's sake!"

Hajime was not one to fall victim to panic very often.  Now was not one of those times.

"Ma?  Are you okay??"

"I went to your father's chest this morning and I got out his gun."

"WHAT??  Ma, what are you doing with Dad's gun?"

"What?  What's she doing with Dad's gun?"

Hajime listened as his mother sniffed on the other end.  "Your father always said, 'Kamatari, do me right and make me proud!'  And then that _worthless_ father of yours left me with you two ungrateful pissants!"

Aoshi looked with concern at his brother.  "Fuck's going on?"

"So I'm just going to end it all…"

Hajime jumped up from the couch, ice pack forgotten.  "WHAT??  Ma, stay where you are!  Me and Aoshi will be over there in twenty minutes!"

"You…fucking…KIDS!!!"

A gunshot echoed loudly into the phone.

"MA!!!"

In his attempt to get pants on, Hajime dropped the phone and both brothers sprawled, completely nude, desperately scrambling for the phone, calling for their mother.

"Ma!!"

Suddenly a burst of laughter trailed out of the earpiece.

"Ma?  Aoshi picked up the line.

"Hahahaha!!  I'm sorry, Aoshi!  I couldn't help myself!!  You boys are too easy to get!"

The man smiled.  "That was a good one, Ma."

"Oh yeah…shit, I thought I was going to piss myself."  Hajime leaned a forehead against the hardwood floor.

The laughter continued and Aoshi remarked to his brother, "She's quite proud of herself, you know."

"I'll bet she is," was the dark reply.

The voice piped in again.  "Aoshi?  Get Hajime on the line.  I want both of you boys to hear this."

Aoshi slapped the back of his brother's head and Hajime held his ear close to the earpiece.

"We're both here, Ma," Aoshi said.

"Now I want you boys to listen.  I know how you get when you take to drinking.  With it being Mardi Gras and all, I want you to promise me something.  No fighting."

"Yes, Ma," they said in unison.

"Your cousin's been up the waitress's skirt all night, poor girl."

Hajime's amused voice thrummed.  "You tell him to take it easy, Ma.  He needs to learn to respect women—the way me and Aoshi do."  Hajime smirked.  "I gave Aoshi his first lesson in sensitivity."

"Fuck you," Aoshi glared.

The woman's voice continued.  "Now, I mean it.  Be good."

"Oh, come on, Ma!  The woman must have been less than five feet tall!  She looked like a weasel."

"Hajime, what are you talking about?"

"We were just trying to make friends and she kicked me in the nuts!"

There was a gasp at the other end.  "What?  Why, that dirty bitch—!!!"

Aoshi spoke up this time, "Don't worry, Ma.  I chanced her a good one, just for you."

Hajime snorted.  "Oh yeah.  Good ol' macho Shinomori."

Aoshi rolled his eyes.  "Jesus fucking Christ."

"The Lord's fucken name!!"

"Our father, who art in Heaven, hallow be thy name," they said in a familiar chorus.

"That's better.  Remember what I said.  No fighting.  Oh, shit.  The neighbor's must have called the cops after the gunshot.  The whole damn neighborhood's coming to see.  Talk to you later."

"Wait, Ma," Hajime said.  "Before you go, how about giving us the goods?  It's been twenty-seven years."

Aoshi nodded ascent.  "Yes.  Which one of us came out first?"

There was a long pause before the feminine voice began.  "Well…I suppose you do have a right to know."  There was a pause as the sound of water sloshed around near the phone piece, a sure sign she was drinking again.  "The one with the bigger cock!  Ha!"  Click.

There was silence as the boys stared in awe ahead of themselves.  Finally, Hajime broke the silence, "What the fuck was that?"

"She's your mother."

"She's _your_ fucken mother!"

"Shit."

The door burst open and Tokio ran in, stopping at seeing two naked, tattooed, muscly men staring blankly at her.

"Hajime, I…oh…"

Megumi came puffing after her.  "Sorry, guys!  I tried to get her to…oh…"

Thin lips slipped into a familiar smirk.  "Came to check if my dick was still in working order, eh, Tokio?  I assure you, I can still last all night if you want me to."

The woman's cheeks pinked slightly.  "Hajime, don't be such a jerk."

Aoshi smiled.  "Yes, or she'll never have sex with you then."

"Shut up."

"Oh…so she really _hasn't_ given it to you, huh?  A shame.  And here I thought you'd never date a girl who didn't put out."

Megumi gave Aoshi a whack on the head.  "Idiot!  Talking about Tokio so crudely…"

"Meg…"

"Apologize."

"Aa."

"WELL…?"

(…)  "I'm sorry."

Megumi smiled and put her arms around the man's shoulders.  "Oh, I'm so proud of you, Oshi-chan!  That's why I cannot resist your cute man ass!"

Hajime turned his head to give his brother an amused look.  "…Oshi-chan?"

Cold grey-blue eyes glared.  "One more fucking word out of you…"

"Bite me."

"Oh, Hajime, be nice!"  Tokio said sweetly.  She knelt beside his sprawled form and traced figures on his shoulder.  "I came all this way to see if you were okay.  That was such a horrible thing for that girl to do!"

"Don't I know it?  I thought I was going to throw up."

"Oh!  So, you're okay, then?"

Hajime sat up and leaned against the couch, pulling Tokio on top of him.  "Oh, definitely."

She smiled.  "I'm so glad.  I was so worried."

He shut her up by leaning over and kissing her.  The kind of kiss you'd expect from a guy like him.  _NOT_ gentle at all.  After making out for a little while, Tokio pulled back.  "You know, Hajime…my first time wasn't at all pleasant and I don't want to repeat that mistake.  I really want it to be special."

"Of course, baby."

"And I really want it to be with someone I care about."

"Mm-hmm…"

"But I…don't want to do it if my partner doesn't want to.  So…do you…do you want to have sex with me?"

There was a shocked pause before Hajime said, "Hell yes," and kissed her again.  Almost as an afterthought, he pulled away and looked at his brother, who was putting on a pair of jeans.  "Get out."

"Fuck off."

Megumi giggled and leaned against Aoshi to watch the couple in front of them.  "Poor Hajime.  I don't think he's ever gone so long without sex.  Tokio's really thrown him for a loop."

"It is a credit to his manhood that he hasn't dumped her in search of someone who will have sex with him."

Meg gave him a coy look.  "You sound frustrated.  Don't tell me you're not getting enough of the fox?  We can definitely arrange to have that fixed, Oshi-chan."

His lips curved upwards in a smile and he put an arm around the woman's waist.  "You do your fair share, Megumi—enough to leave any man exhausted."

Kina's Sake 

Mardi Gras later that night

            "So I told her, 'Bitch, you better have fruit juice to go with this.  I'm not gonna fuck you to have you wake up in the morning and call it rape!"

            Sanosuke Sagara.  Funny man.  Sekihoutai runner.

            Okina looked at his finest patrons and refilled Aoshi's drink.  "Boys, I just want to tell you what a fine bunch you are.  Not only do you bring in fine ladies every now and then, but this could be the last time we're together like this."

            There were scattered protests from the patrons, who assured Okina that they'd be around.  Megumi leaned a head against Aoshi's shoulder and yawned sleepily.  In turn, he smiled fondly at the woman's lack of night-owlishness.  Always a morning person, there had been times when he had gone to her apartment and slept nude beside her, simply because she couldn't stay awake long enough to enjoy foreplay.  Still, his mornings were _always_ pleasant at Megumi's…

            He almost felt sorry for his sexually deprived brother.  Almost.

            "The government's been on my case about selling.  They want to convert it into a school or some shit.  But I don't want any of you to say anything to anybody!  I don't want you fuckers to ruin my good business!  But you know what they say…people in glass houses sink ships.  FUCK!  ASS!"

            Everyone laughed at the old man and Sano was first to speak.  You know, Okina, I gotta get you a proverb book or something.  This mix and match shit's gotta go!"

            As if to prove a point, Saitou remarked, "A penny saved is worth two in the bush."

            "And don't cross the road if you can't get out of the kitchen," added Aoshi.

            Just as Tokio was going to say something, Megumi gave out a screech.  Startling her out of her half-asleep state, were a set of unfamiliar lips to the curve of her neck and shoulder.

Aoshi whirled off of his stool, his black coat arcing with him.  A leg stretched out and kicked the man solidly in the stomach.  Hands reaching out, he grabbed the man by his jacket and shoved him at his companion.  Grey-blue eyes had crystallized into a solid ice blue.

            The man calmly righted himself and adjusted his suit.  "So sorry, sir.  Have you already staked your claim on that one?"

            Koji.  Juppongotana.  Chinese Mob Syndicate.

            Sano jumped up and stepped between the two men.  "Whoa.  Hold it.  Things are getting too tense in here."

            Koji took a menacing step closer, several men materializing to back him up.  "You.  Out now."

            "Hold it, hotstuff.  Don't I get a name?"

            "I'm Koji and my friend here is Usui.  The rest of the boys are under my authority.  We're shutting this place down.  Come quietly and no one else gets hurt."

            Okina glared and the men stood up to back Sano—the two women tight against the counter.  "Why don't you Chinese lackeys make like a tree…AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE??"

Hajime pulled his cigarette out of his mouth.  "I suggest you take our offer.  As you can see, you're outnumbered here."

            "_We_ make the offers."

            Aoshi stared coldly at the Chinese mobsters and in their native tongue, said, "I don't like how they talk."

            Saitou replied, likewise, in Chinese.  "Neither do I.  Maybe we should teach them some manners."

            The Juppongotana men simply stared, shocked.

            Sano laughed good-naturedly.  "Say, Koji, what would you do if I said your pinko, commie mother sucked so much _dick_, her face looked like an egg?!"

            Koji punched him right in the face.

**_Writer's Note:  _**Yay! This chapter was a bit longer.  I am in love with the apartment dialogue, so I'm sorry to reveal to you guys…that Leila Winters has a potty mouth!!!!  I just enjoy Saitou and Aoshi's little give-and-take.  I definitely plan to do more with them in the future.  They're so adorable in their bad-boy visage!

For anyone who's seen the movie _Boondock Saints, _if you're confused, I put in a deleted scene and also added my own.  Gotta play around with the fic, ya know?  ^_^


	3. Saintified Bodies

**_Writer's Note:  _**Sorry about the delay.  Had a few notes I had to double check before posting this.  (dialogue stuff.)  So, here it is in all its glory!  Chapter 3!!!  Sorry, it's a bit slow.  It's still intro to a few characters.  Soon, the _real _stuff begins.  ^_^

MIBU SAINTS!!!  (Yes.  A Leila Winters Production. :P)

The Next Day

Trashed Alleyway

Crime Scene

            Detective Myojin took a spray of binaca in the mouth and continued with his story.  "See, these guys were all drunk from Mardi Gras last night and decided to go strolling down an alley.  Wrong fucken alley.  Because these two huge mother fuckers are just waitin' for 'em."  At Myojin's feet are two familiar bodies from last night.  One has bandages across his head and the other on his ass.  Both are dead.  "So these guys crush these poor sonuvabitches to death and leave the crime scene."

            Detective Myojin.  Rookie.  Police Force.

            Two men stare at Myojin suspiciously.  "That's pretty thin."

            "Very thin."

            Meanwhile, a car pulls up and a man in a dark suit and shocking red hair gets out.

            Special Agent Kenshin Himura.  FBI Criminal Division.

            "Okay.  So say they don't even know the huge guy.  These two are just walking around when this huge fucken giant pops up outta nowhere.  But see, he's smart.  He goes after the guy with the bandages on his head because he knows the guy with the bandages around his ass ain't goin' fucken nowhere.  Where you goin'?  Nowhere."

            Unenthusiastic clapping could be heard from one man.  Yahiko turns to see a red-head smiling at him.  "Top notch, Detective.  So now we have a serial crushers theory and a huge guy theory."

            "Who the fuck are you?  Chief, who the fuck is this?"

            Deftly, the man whips out his wallet, revealing FBI in huge letters.  "That's who I am."

            "Shit."

            Chief Hijikata places a hand on the young officer's shoulders.  "See, Myojin, I ran a few samples in and it turns out these two are with the Chinese mob, which makes this a federal matter.  Say hello to your new boss."

            Kenshin smiled.  "Agent Himura.  Say, Detective, you wouldn't mind getting me a cup of coffee, would you?  Latte with a twist of lemon?  Honey?  Sweet n' Low?  Thank you so much."

            Yahiko looked at the agent for a few moments before storming off.  "Goddammit."

            Agent Himura walked calmly to the first body, bandages on the rear end and closest to the dumpster.  He surveyed the dubris and slipped on a pair of latex gloves.  Pushing play on his walkman, he stuck earplugs in his ears while opera music boomed through the earpieces.

            Strolling to the second body, a few drops of a clear liquid was placed on the skin, turning it a dark purple.  He contemplated this for a moment and noticed that the alley had a perpendicular alleyway to it not far from the body.  Swaying to the music in his ears, he made his way to the end of the alleyway and inspected the brick wall around him.  Turning back around, he practically skipped his way back to the men looking at him curiously.

            Taking out the earphones, he smiled easily at the other officers.  "You sir, I want you to talk to the landlords around here.  See if anyone has been complaining of water leaks."

            "Yes, sir."

            "And you, come over here.  I want you to get me the shells to run by ballistics.  And tell them they're going to have t o dig a slug out of a brick wall and dumpster."

            "Yes, sir."

            Chief Hijikata gave Kenshin a good slap on the back.  "That was fast.  How'd you get all that?"

            Himura beamed with pride.  "It was nothing at all, sir.  The second body tested positive for liquid paraffin.  And bullet holes are usually a big clue, that they are."

            An officer came up to the redhead, her long black ponytail bobbing with her movements.  "Agent Himura.  There's a bar called Kina's Sake not far from here.  There was a bar fight last night.  There's a good chance these guys were involved.

            Kenshin put a hand on her shoulder, causing her to blush.  "Thank you…" (glances at nametag) "Detective Kamiya.  But I'll check it out myself."

            "Uh…Agent Himura?  I can't find the other shell," an officer said.

            "Check beneath the body."

            The officer shifted the second body's shoulder aside.  "Oh yeah…there it is."

            A wide grin spread across the agent's face.  Another officer ran up to him, still panting for breath.  "Sir, there was a lady on the fourth floor complaining of water leaking through her roof just this morning."

            Kenshin nodded.  "Then we're going to the fifth."

            The elevator doors opened to reveal Agent Himura, Chief Hijikata and Detective Myojin—one of whom was calmly sipping from a steaming styrofoam cup.

            Myojin was looking at Himura incredulously.  "No way.  You know how fucking huge you gotta be to do that?"

            Himura lifted an eyebrow.  "Detective Myojin, I may just be wanting a bagel to go with my coffee, that I might."

            Kenshin stepped out of the elevator as Chief Hijikata fixed Myojin with a look.  "I'm not getting' him no fucken bagel."

            They followed Himura out of the elevator, the door to the apartment was already open.  Next to the doorframe, two rosaries hung on nails against the wall…and beneath the doorway stood Himura in the lead with the other officers behind him.  He smiled.

            "We can start the ass kissing with you," he said, pointed at Yahiko, "that we can."

Missionary Corridor

Same Morning

Day-After Mardi Gras Blues

            A sickly little boy sat up in his bed, IV still attached to him.  Seemingly abandoned in this hallway, three nuns hovered together in the corner, and leaning against the boy's bed were Aoshi and Hajime in dirty robes.

            Aoshi coaxed the boy to give him both his hands.  "Now close your eyes.  You'll feel the angels' touch as though they were flesh."

            Using quick as lightning reflexes, Hajime's hand shot out and slapped the boy's hand before returning to its original position.  The boy's eyes opened in awe.

            Aoshi smiled at him.  "There.  So quick, you could hardly even feel it, huh?"

            The three of them laughed together as Okina came down the corridor.

            "What the fuck happened to you guys?  Some FBI agent came snooping around the place.  Didn't tell him anything, but he gave me his card."

            Aoshi parted from the boy with a slight inclination of his head.  "We need you to hold onto a few things for us."

            "Of course.  FUCK!!  ASS!!!"

            The nuns all gasped in horror.

            Hajime handed Okina a short paper bag with handles.  "Don't answer any questions.  We'll be over to pick that stuff up later."

            "Where you boys headed?"

            "The police station," Hajime followed Okina as he began making his way down the corridor.

            Aoshi looked to the boy who had been cowering slightly from the old man.  "He's not angry.  He has a condition up here," he said, pointing to his temple, "that makes him say things like that."

            "FUCK!!  ASS!!!"

Police Department Headquarters

General Work Area

Still Day After Mardi Gras

            Kenshin Himura glared at the local police officers sitting around their desks and casually drinking their coffee.  "Which one of you lowly public servants leaked this to the press?" he asked, his voice low.  When no one replied, he continued.  "Now we have people claiming to know the two men, calling them—get this—'saints'…sent here to do good.  'Angels,' even.  But angels don't kill.  They're just two ordinary men put in an extraordinary situation.  They are to be considered dangerous."

            Detective Myojin swung his legs onto his desk.  "C'mon now, Agent Himura.  They're long gone by now.  We might as well tie a jelly bun on a string and say 'thanks for comin' out!'"

            "Actually, you'd probably have more luck with sake," a voice said.

            There was a noticeable hush in the room and all eyes turned to see two men in bloodied robes—the one with spidery bangs supporting the weight of his companion.

            "Let's go over what happened," Kenshin said, passing a cigarette case to the two men sitting at the table.  The blinds were drawn and the lighting was crappy—a single lamp hanging over the interrogation table, very typical.  "This conversation is going to be recorded.  Just answer the questions honestly and you'll be fine."

            But before he could hit the "record" button, Aoshi reached out a hand and covered it.  "Please."

            Kenshin sat back and gave them a moment.

            Aoshi leaned closer to his brother and asked in a French whisper, "What do we tell him about the guns and money?"

            Hajime gave a nonchalant shrug.  The French rolled easily off his tongue.  [subtitle] "We got scared, ran off and someone else must have picked 'em off the bodies."

            His brother nodded.  Taking his hand away from the recorder, he said, "We're ready."

**_End notes:  _**(Mario music:  Dadadada DA…da!)  Yes…not overly exciting and a bit confusing, I know.  Believe me, the movie is hard to follow at times.  (but OH SO juicy!)  Next chapter is what REALLY happened the night of Mardi Gras after Sano got punched in the face.  ^_^  It's pretty interesting.  Will be posted within a week.  (no need to do checking up, it's just typing.)


	4. Saints Heat Things Up

**_Writer's Note:  _**…lol…the next part's just odd.  Hope ya enjoy!  A bit of S/T action and Ao/Meg.

Mibu Saints [Troy Duffy is a god…]

Last Night (what really happened)

            There was a tense silence as Sano recovered from the blow.  Everyone eyed each other nervously.

            Aoshi's eyes flashed and he said to the Chinese goons in their native language, "That was not very nice."

            Hajime let out a growl.  [subtitle] "Fuck 'em.  Let's just kill them and get it over with."

            The brothers ceremoniously tipped their shot glasses back before shattering them on the floor.  Each took a long drag of their cigarettes and the brawl had begun.

            Sano and Koji swung at each other, managing to knock over several tables and chairs in the process.  Hajime and the other patrons took on several Chinese lackeys.  Aoshi was backed against the wall-length wine rack with Usui advancing.  Several of the other patrons tried to assist him, but Hajime yelled over the din, "Stand back!  He can take care of himself!!" before socking a particularly annoying mobster.

            "I can smell your fear," taunted Usui, as he edged closer to the stoic man.

            When he was an arm's length away, Aoshi reached over his shoulders to grasp two wine necks.  Bringing both bottles on either side of the man's head, glass and red liquid formed a little halo around the fallen Chinese man's body.

            Tokio gave a scream as a man grabbed her arm and attempted to pull her to god-knows-where.  Megumi immediately went to kicking him with her stilettos.  He grunted in pain, but otherwise ignored her efforts.  Suddenly, a stool hit the man in the head and he lay passed out at the women's feet.  They looked up to see Okina smiling at them from behind the counter.

            "You girls should be back here where it's safer!" he said, waving them over.  "FUCK!  ASS!!!"

            The girls immediately went scrambling behind the counter, just missing a guy's body being tossed over their heads.

            Koji lay on his stomach—limbs tied down—on the bar counter.  He gave a scream as Hajime—cigarette still dangling from his mouth—gave a bottle of whiskey a spin through his fingertips, poured it over the man's rear end, spun the bottle back onto the counter and lit a match.  His cruel lips curved upwards as the flames flickered and danced across Koji's ass.

            "FUCK YOU GUYS!!!  SHIT!  PUT IT OUT!"

            The two women covered their mouths with their hands and huddled closer together.  They exchanged concerned glances.

            Sano laughed.  "Holy shit.  That's awesome."

            "Hajime, you were positively cruel!" Tokio said as the four of them were walking along the sidewalk.  It was late and Megumi leaned heavily on Aoshi while he placed an arm around her shoulders.

            "Honestly, Oshi-chan…you really could have hurt someone.  I don't think you know your own strength."  Meg slapped his chest playfully.

            Aoshi gave his girlfriend a surprised look.  "Are you talking from experience?"

            "What?  No!  Well…only when I asked for it."  Meg's laugh had both Aoshi and Tokio's ears turning pink.

            After a while of walking, Tokio's eyes rounded and she looked Hajime in the face.  "Oh, but those men said they were Juppongotana!  What if there's trouble?  Hajime, what have we done??"

            He patted her head fondly.  "Everything will be fine.  Nothing's going to happen."  Almost as an afterthought, he added, "And if they do, Shinomori and I will smash their skulls in."

            "Oh!  So violent, Hajime…"

            "You disapprove?  No one touches the Omitsu brothers."

            "No one, unless they're two very sexy ladies," laughed Meg.

            Hajime and Tokio broke apart from the other couple.  Aoshi looked his brother in the eye and said, "I will walk Meg to her place.  Behave yourself, brother."

            "Fuck you!"

            "Hajime…" Aoshi intoned.

            "You think you're such a fucking saint!"

            "I ask that you behave honorably."

            Hajime snorted and turned away, Tokio's hand in his.  "Righteous prick."

            There was silence as Meg and Aoshi watched the two walk together down the street.

            "Well…that was interesting," the woman said.  "I still find it hard to believe that you and Hajime are twins."

            Aoshi fixed her with a 'don't I know it' stare, but at her violent yawn, put an arm around her shoulder and led her away.

            "Do you think having sex with someone who's asleep is the same as with a dead person?" Meg asked, her voice thick with sleep deprivation.

            "No," Aoshi replied calmly.  "Sex with a sleeping person would be much better.  They would naturally respond and act accordingly."

            "I wonder what it would be like to have an orgasm in a graveyard…"

            Aoshi almost smiled at Megumi's half-asleep banter.  He was close to glad that she hardly ever remembered what was said in the morning.

            When they made it to Meg's apartment building, they stepped into the elevator and stood in companionable silence.  Aoshi gazed down at the woman's perfectly curved, red lips.  Meg blinked sleepily into his shocking grey-blue eyes.  Aoshi tilted his head and offered her a light kiss.

            When the elevator doors opened, Meg had Aoshi's head fully in her grasp, while Aoshi had one hand curving around Meg's cute derriere and the other wrapped around her back, pulling her tighter.  They stumbled together out of the elevator, still wrapped around each other and gasping for breath.  Meg fumbled with her keys, but managed to get the door open with Aoshi doing distracting things to her neck.  They kicked their shoes off and made their way to Meg's bedroom, where she landed with a sound on her bed.

            Aoshi slipped out of his overcoat and joined her, kissing her fully on the mouth.  Megumi's arms went around Aoshi's shoulders, a hand creeping into his hair.

            Aoshi's lips moved to her jaw line, trailing down her neck and decided to stay there, his rosary rubbing against Meg's ribs.  She gave a contented sigh and let her arms rest lightly around his shoulders, his hand on her hip.

            Aoshi felt her foot tapping lightly against his calf in a silent song.  He smiled into her neck.  _She was so cute…_

He felt Meg's breaths steady out and Aoshi paused with a strange suspicion.  He pulled back and sat up, looking at the woman's flushed cheeks and parted, rosy lips.  Her lashes lay lightly on her high cheekbones.

            Aoshi blinked in shock.  Was he really that bad at foreplay?

            He gave her a shake.  "Megumi."

            Nothing.

            He leaned forward and placed his hot mouth right below her ear, sucking slightly at the soft skin there.

            Nothing.

            Goddammit.

            He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, lighting a cigarette.  He thought for a moment and then got out a pad and pen from Megumi's nightstand.

_Meg,_

_            You fell asleep…again.  I changed my mind.  Sex with a sleeping person is as bad as sleeping with a dead person.  Had to leave, stuff to do in the morning.  Will make it up to you later._

_~Aoshi~_

He tore it off the pad and placed it on the pillow next to the sleeping woman.  Pulling on his overcoat, he leaned over and gave Meg a kiss on the cheek.  She snuggled further into her blankets and sighed contently.  Aoshi smiled.  He would go home and take a cold shower.  He wondered how his brother was doing.

            Hajime and Tokio stood outside of her apartment above the sports bar.

            "Hajime…you want to come inside?"

            _Was that an invitation?_

            Hajime smiled.  "Of course."

            They stepped inside where cozy tan carpeting covered the floors and a plump couch screamed comfortable with its stuffed pillows.

            "This is the living room…" Tokio said, taking off her shoes.  Hajime followed suit.  The woman led him to a tiny area with a hard floor and neat white cupboards.  "This is the kitchen and the bathroom's right over there…"

            "Uh huh…" Hajime said, rather disinterested.  His jeans were starting to itch.

            Tokio continued walking and finally entered a room with a large window.  "And this is my room."

            _Excellent._

With cat-like speed, Hajime pounced on Tokio and laid her flat on her back, the bed bouncing slightly with the impact.  He kissed her for a while before Tokio pulled away and sat up.

            "Hajime!  We couldn't possibly sleep together tonight!  I'm still a bit shaken up from that fight earlier!"

            Hajime sighed and put an arm around her.  "Of course, baby."

            "I mean, I don't want to upset you or anything…"

            "No, of course not."

            "Are you angry with me, Hajime?"

            "No, not at all."

            Distressed, Tokio stood up and retreated to the far wall.  "You _are _upset!  This is all my fault!"

            Hajime rolled his eyes and stood up.  He went over to the teary-eyed woman and ushered her back onto the bed.  "It's okay.  We can always have sex another time.  Rainy days and Mondays are best for me.

            Tokio immediately started giggling.

            "And if that doesn't work for you, I'll play hooky _once _for you, so if you want to, just give me a call and I'll jump right over."

            "Stop, you're embarrassing me."

            "You love it."

            She grinned cheekily at him.

            Hajime rose from his seat with a sigh.  "I better get going.  Man's gotta have his rest.  Besides, Aoshi has nightmares if I'm not there for him."

            "Really?" Tokio asked, following him to the door.

            "No."

            "Hajime!"

            "Lock the door after I go."

            "You're not mad at me, are you?"

            "No, I'm not.  Sex isn't everything, woman."

            Tokio gave him a dubious look.  "I don't believe you."

            The man placed a hand in the doorframe and leaned against it.  "Tokio…the world will not end if you make me angry."

            The woman nervously traced the kanji along Hajime's hand.  "I-I know…it's just…I never seem to say the right thing."

            Hajime smiled and patted the top of her head.  "But it just makes you more interesting.  Bye."

            "Oh, but wait, Hajime!"

            He stopped and regarded her with his narrow eyes.

            "Aren't you going to kiss me goodbye?"

            Hajime gave a cocky little smirk before cupping Tokio's face in his hands.  Each time their lips touched, they lingered a little more until multiple kisses melted into one.

            "Mmmm…" Tokio said, "You kiss like an angel."

            "Oh, no," Hajime admonished.  "An angel would never kiss like that."

            With a chuckle, Hajime walked out the door and heard Tokio lightly shut the door.

            _Fuck.  I'll never hear the end of this from Shinomori._

            The moon shone over the twin beds through a grimy window.  Aoshi and Hajime lay on their respective beds, clad in boxers, staring at the ceiling aimlessly.

            "So, Tokio held out on you again."  It was a statement.

            "Shut up."

            "Did you break up with her?"

            "I'm not the fucker you are."

            "…"

            "Meg turn paraplegic on you?"

            "Don't fucken talk about Meg."

            "The bitch can't even stay awake long enough for you to screw her."

            "FUCK YOU!"

            "What?  The sex with her is good, though, right?"

            "…Aa."

            "So, it's worth it, right?"

            "Aa."

            "Least one of us is getting laid."

            There was a short pause.  "You are the better man, brother."

            Morning came and the brothers sat on the edge of their beds, pulling on their robes.  Suddenly, the door burst open and both men looked startled as two familiar intruders pointed guns at them.

            Usui, bandages around his head, kept his gun at Aoshi's temple as he dragged him over to the dingy toilet.

            Koji, bandages covering his ass, motioned for Hajime to stand up.

            Aoshi put up no struggle as he was forced to kneel in front of the commode, his hands behind the pipes.

            "Cuff yourself!" commanded Usui.  Before Aoshi had a chance, the Chinese mobster reached over and tightened the handcuffs to a painful level.  "You think I'm going to kill you for what you did?" he breathed down Aoshi's neck.  "I'll do worse than that.  Instead, I'll kill your brother.

            "FUCK YOU!  Get back here!"  Aoshi struggled against the cuffs, but they dug into his skin.

            Hajime shrugged off Koji's hand.  "It was just a fucken bar fight!  You guys are pussies!"

            Before Hajime turned to leave, he fixed his brother with a look and the now-ice blue eyes sparked back.

            The three men filed out the door, leaving behind the two rosaries hanging next to the doorframe and Aoshi cuffed to a toilet.

            Koji forced Hajime onto his knees next to a dumpster in the alleyway.  "I'm gonna blow your fucken brains out, Jap."

            "Try it, Chink."

            Cold steel pressed itself against Hajime's forehead.

            In fury, Aoshi pulled at his bonds until they drew blood upon his wrists.  Using his shoulder, he rammed into the toilet's backing over and over again, screaming out as the blows sent pain shooting through his body.  His arms still wrapped around the bowl, he pushed with his braced legs until he felt the ceramic relenting, the blood dripping onto the floor.  Water rushed out from beneath the unit and Aoshi hefted it—carrying it out onto the roof of the apartment complex.

            Usui, gun in hand, looked down an adjacent alley.

            "Say your prayers, dumbfuck."

            Aoshi's eyes glowed an ominous light blue as he looked down at his brother being held at gunpoint.  Tipping over the toilet in his arms, he let it drop off the side of the building and then leapt after it.

            Hajime stared up at an object above Koji's head and upon realizing what it was, ducked.  The ceramic crashed with deadly force and Koji's gun fired right into the dumpster before his body collapsed.

            Usui looked up just in time to see Aoshi crashing into him from above.  The trigger went off, the bullet jamming itself into the brick wall of the perpendicular alley.

            Hajime opened his eyes and saw his brother passed out next to a moaning Usui.  He immediately got up and grabbed a nearby toilet lid, bringing it down repeatedly on the man's skull, the blood seeping through the bandages.

            Finding a paper bag, he patted down both mobsters and placed guns, money and whatever else seemed useful into the bag.  Koji's pager, he placed in his robe pocket.  Then Hajime went to his brother—cuffs still on him and very bloody—hefted him over his shoulder.

            So they went in their tattered robes and paper bag to the missionary.

            Agent Himura smiled at the two men while Hajime blew smoke rings.  "That is a very interesting story, boys.  What other languages do you speak?"

            Aoshi smiled back and nudged his brother.  "[French] This guy is very, very sharp."

            Hajime nodded.  "[Italian] Something tells me we'll have to watch out for him."

            "[German] I like him.  He is very honest."

            Hajime took a puff.  "[Russian] Good men are hard to come by, nowadays."

            Kenshin gave an embarrassed laugh.  "That's amazing."

            "Our mother insisted on it," stated Aoshi.

            "What are you guys doing, working in a freakin' meat packing plant?"

            Both boys just shrugged.

            Myojin opened the door to the interrogation room.  "Sorry, Agent Himura.  Chief Hijikata says that if you're all done here, it's time to make a statement to the press."

            The redhead stood up.  "Well, you boys aren't being charged.  You wanna go home now?"

            Hajime scowled.  "No pictures."

            "Is there any way we can stay here?"  Aoshi asked.

            Yahiko immediately brightened.  "Oh yeah, if you want, we have an extra holding cell…" he paused, noticing that Kenshin was looking at him with a wide smile.  "Um…can't they stay here?"

            Agent Himura batted his eyelashes.  "You're going to have to ask your mom, but it's okay with me if your friends stay over."  He paused in the doorway to smile cheerily at the Omitsu brothers.  "Nice meeting you fellas.  Time to go feed the dogs."

**_End Notes:  _**Meg and Tokio originally do not exist, but I figured that it'd be fun for the boys to have little girlfriends.  So know that all the dialogue with, and most likely about them, is original.

God also does not make an appearance in the movie.  However, I felt that in order to clarify our boys' roles in the story, it was important to include Him.

Okina's got Tourette's.  LOL…I find that funny for some reason.  (Though, I didn't include the other tics that come with that disease…twitching, repetition, etc.)

Originally, it's the Irish and Italians against the Russians.

**FORGOTTEN SCENE:  **Back when the boys are naked in their apartment and their mother says, "The one with the bigger cock!" in reply to who was born first, Aoshi looks over at Hajime and smiles cheekily.  To which, Hajime says, "Don't even fucken start.  I've had ice on mine."  [I kicked myself when I realized I forgot to include it, but I don't really want to go back and change it, because I already have a little closing line.  Damn.]

Also, the storytelling is jumpy and confusing (think Quentin Tarentino, _Reservoir Dogs _or _Pulp Fiction_) but I'll be happy to answer any questions/concerns you folks have.

Lastly, the sequel to _Boondock Saints_ is supposed to come out within a year…it's going to be called _All Saints Day_.  Isn't that great?  The brothers are saints.  I swear.  ^_^


	5. Saints Up Close and Personal

**_Writer's Note:  _**Very sorry it took forever!  I lost my computer disk and went through a freak out stage.  And then…well, I had a hard time writing it.  (It was about a week later that I began writing a completely different fic specifically for the Ice and Fire Contest, which can be checked out from my profile page!)  This chapter is…well, necessary for development.  Hope you like!!!

            Agent Himura stood behind Chief Hijikata as a camera and multiple microphones edged ever closer.

            "Are the Omitsu brothers being charged with murder?"

            "Do you believe that these men are really saints?"

            "Is it true that the Chinese Mob is looking to buy out Kina's Sake down the street?"

            The Chief merely waved the questions away.  "The Omitsu brothers are not being charged with the two murders.  It was a clear-cut case of self-defense and they will be released from custody at an undisclosed place at an undisclosed time.  Thank you."

            Squeezing through the crowd of people, Sano made his way to the door, which Agent Himura held open for him.  For a split second, eye contact was established and then broke off as Sanosuke entered the Police Headquarters.

            Hajime and Aoshi were waiting in their cell when Sano came in.

            "Hey, how you guys holding up?"

            Aoshi patted him on his back and inspected the stubble on the Funny Man's chin.  "It suits you."

            "You think?  Maybe the girls will see it as too hairy..."

            "What'd you bring us?"  Hajime interrupted.

            Sano presented them with two pairs of jeans, two black shirts and their black overcoats.

            Aoshi smiled appreciatively.

            "But that's not all," with a grin, Sano pulled two rosaries from beneath his shirt and slipped them off his neck.

            "The moron did something right for a change."

            Each brother slipped their rosaries around their necks and playfully punched Sano in the arm.

            "So, are you guys allowed conjugal visits?"

            "What are you talking about?" Aoshi eyed the man.

            "Well, the ladies just couldn't take me snooping around your apartment.  Begged me to take them with me."

            Tokio burst in and ran right into Hajime's arms.  "I saw it on the news!  I was so worried about you, Hajime!  I told you!  I told you the Mob was going to get you!"

            "Don't worry, Tokio.  Nobody got me.  I'm fine.  See?  Not a scratch."

            Meg came in quietly and eyed Aoshi for a long moment.  Sano raised his eyebrows at the man and backed towards the doorway.

            "I'll leave you guys to your respective ladies...don't do anything Okina would.  Later!"

            "Aoshi..." Meg began, looking up at him uneasily.

            _Uh oh...she used my real name._

"...Aa...?" Aoshi murmured, almost tentatively.

            "Did you really kill those men?"

            "They were going to kill Hajime."

            "Yes or no?" she demanded.

            Aoshi paused.  He did not like this.  It felt _wrong_.  "I..."

            Meg's surprised look told him she had just noticed his hands.  "Oh my god..." a flash of anger flared in her eyes.  "Did they do this to you?"

            But Aoshi shook his head, his bangs swishing with the movement.  "I did it to myself."

            Tears came then, big, wet ones sliding down porcelain cheeks.  Meg lurched into his arms with a sob and pressed her face into a warm chest.  Aoshi slid his arms tightly around her body, his chin resting on the top of Meg's head.

            _"I was so scared..."_

"..."

            "Aoshi, say something...I've been worried sick over you!" she choked on a sob and burrowed deeper into the thin cotton robe.  "Please..."

            "I'm sorry I made you worry."

            Megumi hiccupped.  "I don't want you doing anything else reckless!  I want you to be safe!  If I lost you..."

            "You will not lose me."

            "I need to be with you.  What if—"

            _"You will not lose me!" _he said vehemently.

            Meg started at his tone.  It seemed as though the tears would not stop.

            Aoshi placed a hand on the top of her head and pushed her into his shoulder.  "I will be here as long as you need me to be."

            He meant to exchange a look with his brother, but Hajime was busy sitting on the bed with Tokio tracing the edge of his ear with a finger, a satisfied smirk on his face.

            Night had come and the women had gone.  The brothers lay on their separate beds placed only a foot away from each other.

            Shirtless, jeans and rosaries hanging on their necks, they once again stared at the cracks in the ceiling.

            Jail.  It felt strange to be "just visiting."

            "Shinomori."

            Aoshi scowled at the ceiling above.  "What is it, _Saitou?"_

            His brother grimaced.  "Sorry.  I was wondering what it was that you see in that fox of yours.  She seems...ill-suited for you."

            Aoshi could feel amusement tugging at the edge of his mouth.  "She is the things I am not in all the right places."

            Hajime rolled his eyes.  "My own brother, sounding like a fucken pussy."

            "You really must have a death wish."

            "I'm not the one who sounds like some lovesick puppy.  You call yourself a fucken man..."

            "More than we can say about you."

            "What?  Fuck you!  I'm _all _man, fuckhead!  Just because I haven't done the beastly duty like you every night, doesn't mean my penis is dead!"

            Aoshi smiled then.  "Why _do you continue to see Tokio?"_

            Hajime was quiet for a long time, actually considering the question.  Finally, he said, his voice full of wonder, "I've never had anyone to worry over me the way she does."

            God spoke to them that night.  While they slept and the heavy rains sang over the city walls.  His voice came to them with the wisdom of their earthly father, his familiar voice deep and resonant.

            _"And when I vest my flashing sword and my hand takes hold in judgment, I will take vengeance upon mine enemies and I will repay those who haze me.  O Lord, raise me to Thy right hand and count me among Thy saints."_

The sanctified water began seeping through the cracks in the ceiling, dribbling onto foreheads and running down temples to disappear into hair.  This time, God's voice came to them as their heavenly father, his holy tenor whispering in their minds, that unmistakable voice echoing its purpose.

            _"Whosoever shed last blood, by man, shall his blood be shed.  For immunity of God make he the man.  Destroy all that which is evil, so that which is good may flourish.  And I shall count thee among my favored sheep, and you shall have the protection of all the angels of heaven."_

Gasping for breath, both brothers arched their backs, the water running over their closed eyelids.  They sat up, their rosaries jingling against their ribs.

            Hajime looked over at his brother, his eyes full of purpose.  "Destroy that which is evil."

            "So that which is good may flourish," finished Aoshi.

            Morning came and the boys began lazily dressing.  The familiar black shirt and jeans fitting just so.  Each brother looked straight into the other's eyes with deadpan expressions.  An agreement passed between them in their silent, secret language.

            Out of nowhere, a loud, annoying beeping noise screamed nearby.  Both men looked around, puzzled.  Hajime dug around in his discarded robe and pulled out a small black object.

            "Hm.  That chink's pager.  Wanna go check it out?"

            At Aoshi's nod, they left their holding cell to enter the general office area where the officers had coffee waiting for them.  They had already become favorites among the law enforcers.

            "Ay!  Aoshi, get a good night's rest?"

            "Hope you two make it home okay."

            "Wanna go out for drinks later?"

            Hajime was walking in the lead when something short ran into him.  He looked down to see a flustered woman.

            "Oh...e-excuse me, Mr. Omitsu..."

            But he just ignored her and continued walking.  Aoshi stayed back to keep the girl company.

            "Y-you're Aoshi, right?" at his nod, the girl continued, "I'm Detective Kaoru Kamiya.  I was wondering if you've seen that special agent from yesterday..."

            "No, I haven't."

            The girl looked disappointed.  "Oh...okay.  Thanks anyways."  As she was turning to go, Yahiko appeared behind her, slapping an arm around her shoulders.

            "So...Kaoru, still lookin' for that redhead?"

            "No!  Get away Myojin!  I don't want to be seen fraternizing with you!"

            The young detective was unfazed.  "So...you think he's a natural redhead?  You know...above _and below?"_

            In retaliation, the girl hit the boy over the head with her nightstick.  "Don't act so stupid, Detective!  Just because you have no friends, don't bug me about it!  And while you're at it, leave Aoshi out of it, too."

            The young man rubbed the sore spot on his head.  "Aw, shit.  That smarts, ya stupid raccoon."

            "FUCK YOU!"

            Meanwhile, Hajime had borrowed some change from an officer and went to a nearby pay phone.  He quickly dialed the number on Koji's pager and on the first ring, a Chinese voice came on.

            "Golden Leaves Hotel.  Suite number 24.  Tomorrow at 8pm."

            The line abruptly cut off while Hajime was jotting down the information on a small piece of paper.  Hanging up the phone, he stuffed the slip into his pocket.

            "Amen."

            Aoshi waved his farewells to the officers before joining his brother and exiting the building into the blinding sunlight.

Some Ratty Warehouse

Base of Operations

Later that Afternoon

            Sanosuke Sagara knocked on the little office door.  It opened a crack and lazy eyes peered at him.

            "What the fuck do you want?"

            _Great.  His least favorite person.  _The young man held up a small brown baggie.  "Got a package for Papa Sou."

            The door swung open the rest of the way to reveal a lanky man in a smutty white business suit.

            Kanryuu Takeda.  Don's Personal Assistant.  Sekihoutai Mobster.

            When the greasy assistant reached for Sano's parcel, the man held it out of range.  "Said I was to deliver it _myself._"

            "Give me the fucken thing," Takeda snatched the bag from the young fighter's grasp and dropped it on his boss's desk, remaining a sentinel next to the Don's office desk.

            Sano sat himself across from his employer, who was currently on the phone.

            "Listen, you little cocksucker, we had an agreement!  Drag your ass out of bed and get me my money!"

            Souzou Sagara.  Papa Sou.  Sekihoutai Don.

            Kanryuu eyed the young fighter with disdain.  "Where'd you get that black eye, Funny Man?"

            Sano ignored him.

            "Hee hee hee, I think I'm so fucken fun-ee..."

            _Takeda is an asshole._

            Sou sprang from his seat, the phone clutched in his white-knuckled fingers.  "You know what??  Your number's up, you insignificant little fuck!"  And with that, he slammed it down on the receiver.  In frustration, he sat down, a hand under his chin.  "I shouldn't have done that," he said to Sano.  "You're not supposed to tell a guy you're going to kill him anymore.  I tell ya, it takes all the fun out of the job."

            The Don reached an arm out and opened up his specially-delivered bag.  Pulling out a saran-wrapped ham and cheese sandwich, he unwrapped it and took a big bite.  "Whenever the boys come over, they always talk about what a crackup you are.  Cheer me up."

            Sano looked like a deer in headlights. "I don't think…"

            "Listen.  I'm having a shitty day.  Tell me a funny joke."  Papa Sou took a generous bite of his sandwich and chewed expectantly, his black hair dancing.

            The fighter scratched his head and glanced at the ceiling.  "Uh…okay.  There was this, uh, tourist, an imperialist…"

            "Bastard!" yelled Papa Sou.

            "Yeah.  That's what I said.  An imperialist bastard, and a Japanese guy…" he was starting to sweat.  "So they're all in the desert and they think they're gonna die when this genie pops up out of nowhere and tells each guy he'll grant them one wish.  So the tourist says to the genie, 'I want all the tourists everywhere to go back to their homes and be happy and everything.'  So POOF, all the tourists everywhere are back in their homes.  And the imperialist guy…"

            "Bastard," reminded Takeda.

            "Uh, the im—uh—bastard guy says to the genie, 'I want all the imperialist bastards to be on their own island and happy and everything.'  And POOF, all the imperialist bastards are on their own little island…and uh…this joke isn't funny, sir…"

            With that, Papa Sou set his sandwich down, giving Sano his undivided attention.  "Continue the joke."  It was not a request.

            Sano looked like he was going to cry.  "So the genie looks at the Japanese guy and wants to know what his wish is.  The man asks, 'You mean to tell me that all the tourists and imperialist bastards are out of Japan?  Well…I'll have a Coke, then.'"

            There is a pained silence before Souzou Sagara bursts into laughter, Takeda cautiously joining him.  "…'I'll have a Coke, then…'"

            Sano laughed nervously, beginning to relax.  "Yeah, they're all out, so…ahaha…"

            When the Don had stopped laughing, he wiped a tear out of his eye and said, "Tell me another."

            "…w-what?"

            Deep in a poorly lit basement, Hajime and Aoshi sat across a small coffee table from a man with blond hair spiked up in a wild manner.  Nicely tanned hands placed two guns, a few bundles of cash, a pager, two wallets and a watch on the dusty surface.  It was quiet as the man with the blond hair appraised them.  Sighing, he threw the brothers two black duffel bags.

            "Knock yourselves out, boys."

            Music seemed to ring in their ears as the lights went on, revealing a caged off area filled with all sorts of goodies.

            Antique guns, stealth guns, military-issue guns, government-issue guns, flamethrowers, mass-destructive materials and all the nice things that come with them lined the walls on various holders and displays.

            Hajime looked wonderingly around and said, "It's like the fucken Terminator."

            Each brother stuffed their duffel bags with various things.  It was like shopping at Macy's in December.  Hajime picked a knife off the wall and tested it's weight.  "Nice…"  It was a rugged, jungle-type hand-held number with fancy blade cuttings.  Discreetly, he slipped it into his bag.

            Strolling away from his bag, he went to fiddle around with a machine gun sitting on a tripod.

            Aoshi paused in his browsing when an idea came to him.  "You know what we need?  Some rope."

            Hajime made a face.  "Rope?  What the fuck do you need rope for?"

            "I don't know.  Charlie Bronson's always got rope and they always end up using it."

            "That's the stupidest fucken thing I've ever heard.  That's the movies, asshead."

            Aoshi glanced at his brother's bag, pulling out the knife.  "Is that so, Rambo?"

            He was looking down the barrel of a machine gun faster than J-Lo kicking Matt Damon in the ass.

            "Alright.  Get your stupid fucken rope."

            Aoshi smiled at his brother.  "I'll get my rope," he said, walking over to the wall and picking out a coil.  "There's some rope right here."

            "You're such a child, Aoshi."

            "This, coming from the man who still prematurely ejaculates?"

            "WHAT??  Where the hell did that come from??"

            "There's nothing wrong with that."

            "Yes there is!  But I'm NOT a premie, fucksucker!  Must be tough being frigid."

            "How about you shut your mouth?"

            "How about I kick your ass??"

            _God was dying.  Oh, his health was all well and good…but his children cracked him up.  There was just no helping it.  They were born to do good on earth _and _good in heaven…_

_            It was an effort to stay seated on his white cirrus couch._

            Later, standing in the hotel's elevator, the brothers exchanged a look.  Still in their jeans and rosaries, long-sleeved black turtlenecks adorned their lithe figures.

            Hajime observed his brother for a few moments.  In all seriousness, he asked, "Are you nervous?"

            Aoshi took a shaky breath.  "A bit."

            Hajime smiled at that.  "Icy Tuesday being humane?"

            "You really are a fucken jackass, Hajime."

            "Just bringing you good cheer, brother," with a chuckle, Hajime hit the emergency stop button.  The elevator came to a halt and the boys slipped on their black ski masks.  Crossing themselves with rope slung around both of their shoulders, Hajime crouched and gave his brother a boost.

**_End Notes:  _**Ha ha ha…sorry again, folks, for the delay!  Some expressed a concern about Special Agent Kenshin Himura…now if you've seen the movie, it is made blatantly apparent that the agent is gay.  In my story…I prefer to keep it a bit more ambiguous…perhaps you'd all agree that certainly Kenshin is "femmy."  ^_^

About Papa Sou's sandwich…okay, so they don't really eat cheese in Japan.  SUE ME.

Also, this was written when Ben and J-Lo's little fling was still "on."  The injustice of it all still burns me!  J-Lo is a complete bitch, Ben's an ass and poor Damon's the one getting kicked around.  It's obvious he's the brains of the operation.  Lol…

Thanks everyone for being patient and most likely helpful in some way.  I fully intend to complete this story!  **Next Chapter:  **THE HOTEL!!!  (Sorry, no sex.  Just blood, gore and some laughs.  ^o^)


	6. The Saints' First Official Escapade

**_Writer's Note:  _**Mmm…lots of stuff going on lately…school…dramas…illness…hope you guys are doing well!!!  Go out and laugh up a storm.  :D  This next section was written with a bit of trouble.  Hope it turned out okay.

(The only change I made is that Omasu is the news reporter.  I suddenly realized that Omasu was the one with the cute, innocent voice.  THAT'S the one I meant!  :P )

Mibu Saints is brought to you by…the letter "J."

The Next Day

Golden Leaves Hotel, Suite #24

Crime Scene

            Special Agent Kenshin Himura took a look around the bloody chaos of the room with a shake of his head.  His yellow eyes narrowed as he thought about the new situation.

            Yahiko sighed heavily.  "It was a fucken massacre, that's what it was."

            Himura seemed at a loss of where to start.  He looked behind the sectional couch to see a bloody body.  "Myojin, how many bodies are there?"

            "Eight."

            The agent sent him a look.

            "Shit!  I forgot about that one!  Nine.  Nine?"

            Kenshin leapt onto the sectional's backing and balanced as he walked its length.  "What do you guys think?"

            Yahiko smiled, he was feeling a bit more confident at this point.  "All these guys were part of a major Chinese syndicate called the Juppongotana.  Look, I don't care about all the other fucks," he said, walking to the center of the room where a body was haloed by its own blood, "this guy was their target."

            Kenshin remained impassive.  "What makes you say that?"

            "His name's Makoto Shishio.  He's the guy who's been leading the whole operation.  Plus, he's the only one who was done right:  double tap to the head.  They definitely went after the queer man."

            "Excuse me?"

            There was a pained silence.  Everyone was aware of how femmy the special agent was, but no one had said anything until now.

            "…the weird man," Myojin corrected.

            "Well," began Himura a bit haughtily, golden eyes sharp, "now we know what everyone _really _thinks about.  So…you think they went after the _queer _guy, huh?  Makes ya feel like Riverdancing."

            Without further ado, Himura began dancing a little jig as all eyes only stared.  As if humoring them, the redhead asked, "But why the pennies?"

            Everyone looked at the bodies strewn about, all with pennies on their eyes.

            Detective Kaoru looked at the man who seemed to be surrounded by a halo of an entirely different kind.  "Uh…the killer wants to leave a distinctive mark?"

            Kenshin shook his head.  "No.  There's something else going on here.  They were placed with religious intent.  Some still place pennies on the eyes of the dead.  The Sicilians.  The Italians…"

            Yahiko furrowed his brows.  "What's the symbology there?"

            "Symbology?" the agent raised a brow at the young detective.  "The word you are looking for is 'symbolism.'  What is the symbolism?"

            Jumping down from his perch, Himura prepared himself to give them a lesson.  "In Greek and Roman mythology, after you died, you had to pay the fare for Charon—the boat fare man who rowed you across the river to the afterlife.  When a body died, you would place pennies on the eyes of those who passed on so that they could atone for the sins they committed in life."

            Yahiko smiled.  "That's pretty impressive."

            "That's because I'm an expert at 'nameology,'" he grinned before walking to the body of the one called Makoto Shishio…the one with the holes in the back of his head.  "Look at these burn wounds.  What do they tell you?"

            Kaoru squinted, trying hard to see something on the gory entry wounds.  "Um…he was shot at a downward angle…they put him on his knees?"

            "Excellent, Detective Kamiya.  Chief?"

            "There were two shooters."

            "Fan-freakin-tastic.  Myojin?"

            "Uh…they shot him at a downward angle…?"

            Himura's face fell.  "No.  It tells us, he was the last to go."

            Yahiko threw his hands up in confusion.  "Whoa!  Wait a minute!  How do you get that?"

            Kenshin gave a patient smile.  "The guys came in here, shot everyone and put this guy on his knees for a proper execution-style death.  Pop pop.  And then they go and put pennies on everyone's eyes."

            "I guess that makes sense…" eyed Myojin reluctantly.  "But what about one guy, two guns?"

            The agent shook his head.  "The angles are too extreme.  No guy would cock out his elbows like that.  If you were gonna shoot a guy in the back of the head with two guns, it's natural to hold them side-by-side.  Besides, you're telling me, one guy came in here and shot eight guys with eight incredibly well-aimed bullets?"  he shook his head, "Had to have been at least two."

            _In the vents of the upscale hotel, Hajime and Aoshi crawled around, flashlights waving._

_            Makoto Shishio stood in the center of the suite, many Juppongotana members sitting on the sectional couch, others standing ominously around.  He was speaking passionately to the assembled men._

_            Hajime paused, flashlight searching the area in front of him.  He looked over his shoulder at his brother and the ducts beyond him.  "Shit…"_

_            He crawled a few feet forward before turning a full 180 degrees and squeezing past his brother in the opposite direction.  Aoshi followed suit and turned around in the narrow space, his feet scuffing the bottom of the vent._

_            "Where the fuck are you going?" Aoshi demanded._

_            "SHH!  I'm trying to figure out some shit!"_

_            "Fuck you!  I'm lugging around this fucking duffel bag, sweating my ass off.  It must weigh fifty pounds!"_

_            Hajime sat up a bit higher.  "Yeah, well, I'm carrying your stupid fucken rope.  It's chafing me."_

_            Aoshi hit Hajime in the forehead with his flashlight.  "Get a fucking hold of yourself!"_

_            Hajime returned the gesture with his own flashlight.  "_**You** _get a fucking hold of yourself!"_

_            There was a tense pause before both brothers lounged at each other, heedless of where they were._

            Makoto Shishio was definitely yelling at his subordinates, gesticulating wildly.  The Japanese were at war with the Chinese.  Polite rivalry was no longer a part of the repertoire.  The Juppongotana were going to trample the weaker Japanese boy scout forces such as the Sekihoutai and Yakuza.  There was no room for failure.

_            The two men wrestled angrily in the air duct, banging against the metal sides, their ropes tangling around them.  Both stopped simultaneously, holding their breaths—reality coming back to them._

_            "Shit," Hajime said._

_            Beneath them, the vent gave way and they fell through._

_            The man who would later be identified with two bullet holes in the back of his head, ducked out of the way of crumbling plaster._

_            The tangled rope held the brothers suspended in the air—upside down—their backs together.  The other Juppongotana members kicked into action, pulling out their pieces and pointing them at the invaders._

_            Still dangling like Christmas ornaments, the Omitsu Brothers fingered their shoulder holsters and fired their shots like expert marksmen as together they spun—giving them free range of the entire room.  Cold blue-grey eyes surveyed the carnage as shot after shot, the wicked were taken down.  Hajime deftly rifled through his duffel bag and quickly cut the ropes with his Rambo knife, the boys falling to the carpet._

_            Makoto Shishio, on his knees with the Omitsu Brothers standing behind him, masks discarded, implored his men to take action.  Two guns pressed against the back of his head held by two gloved hands whose marks were hidden from all…engraved to the very bone was Aku Soku Zan with Honor Through Strength._

_            Together, the brothers chanted a familiar verse, "And shepherds we shall be…for thee, my Lord, for thee.  Power hath descended forth from Thy hand, our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands.  So we shall flow a river forth to Thee and teeming with souls shall it ever be.  In nomeni patri et fili spiritus sancti."_

_            And thus, two holes in his head made not Makoto Shishio alive._

_            In all righteousness, both men pulled out their crosses, a strange new blood coursing through their veins.  Their gloved hands held pennies, which they placed very carefully on each unseeing eye in the room._

_            As if drunk on the blood he himself spilled, Hajime raised his arms toward heaven, appearing very much like Jesus Christ crucified, his eyes closed with the sensation._

_            Aoshi lifted his rosary to his lips, feeling the warmth of his cross like a familiar lover's._

Kenshin looked around him once more, the bodies in a scattered circle.  Above him, the gaping hole in the room left no question of the place of entry.  "Television," he said to himself.

            "Excuse me, sir?"  Kaoru turned to give the FBI agent a questioning look.

            "Television," repeated the man, "That's the answer, that it is.  He gestured to the hole above.  "Crawling around through the vents, crashing through the ceiling…that James Bond stuff doesn't happen in real life!  Professionals don't do that!"

            Yahiko snorted.  "Kids these days.  Watching too many fucken movies."

            _The two brothers looked around the room in awe.  They seemed very proud of themselves._

_            "That was surprisingly easy," mused Hajime, already lighting a cigarette and puffing happily.  "In the movies, there's always that guy that jumps out from behind the couch."_

_            "And then you have to shoot him for ten fucking minutes, too!" Aoshi agreed._

_            In the lighthearted aftermath, both looked about the room with amused smiles on their faces._

_            "Name one thing we're going to need the stupid fucking rope for…" Aoshi prodded._

_            "To stick it up your pussy ass, motherfucker…" mimicked his brother crossly.  In the next moment, Hajime stroked his chin in mock contemplation.  "What do you suppose is in that case over there?" he asked, indicating a small briefcase leaning against the wall._

_            There was a still silence before both brothers bolted for it.  Just to be sure Aoshi was not the one to reach the case first, Hajime shoved roughly at his brother's shoulder and put on an extra burst of speed.  With a click, the case opened, revealing neatly stacked columns of money._

_            Aoshi eyed the loot as his brother passed a wad of it under his nose, inhaling at that minty-fresh, I'm-your-new-best-friend smell.  "The hits just keep coming," came Aoshi's amused voice._

Standing behind the suite's mini-bar, Kenshin poured drinks for the gathering detectives.

            "This is no small matter.  We will soon have a secret war to be wrought among the Chinese and Japanese.  For decades, there has been much animosity, but since the Chinese have been invading known Japanese mob territory, it has escalated in the past few years.  I have a dossier on every man in this room.  This is serious stuff."

            _A knock on the suite's door followed by a gruff, "Room service!" turned our heroes' attention away from the money._

_            "What?"  Hajime eyed the door suspiciously._

_            "Did you order room service?"_

_            "What??"  Hajime knocked his brother over the head.  "Fuck no!  Are you fucken retarded??"_

_            Both crept to the door's peephole and Aoshi squinted into it.  "Shit," he whispered, looking at his brother in shock.  "It's Sagara."_

_            Hajime shoved his brother aside to see for himself.  There stood The Funny Man…a tasseled bellboy hat on his scruffy hair, maroon uniform, and a little nametag that read:  Jafar._

_            Hajime stifled a laugh as a mischievous spark flashed in his eyes.  "This must be his first job!  …We've gotta fuck with him!"_

_            Both brothers chuckled to themselves as they slipped on their dark ski masks, guns in hand and hiding on either side of the door as they allowed it to open._

Sanosuke Sagara strolled in, pushing his food cart.  Before he got three feet in the room, the door slammed shut behind him and someone grabbed a handful of his hair, pulling him to the ground.

_            "Get on the fucking floor!!!" the voice bellowed.  "_Get_ on the _fucking_ floor!!!"_

_            "Where's your gun?" the other masked man asked, his own piece aimed for the fighter's head.  "I said, 'where's your gun,' fucknuts??"_

_            Hajime tore a pistol from The Funny Man's uniform pocket.  Releasing Sagara's hair from his grasp, he gave a colorful curse.  "Look at this shit!!!"  Hajime showed his brother the gun.  "This is a fucken six-shooter, genius!  There's nine bodies. What were you gonna do??  Laugh the last three to death??  FUNNY MAN??"_

_            Aoshi, gun still pointed at Sano's head, let out a low growl.  "What should we do?"_

_            "We gotta kill this motherfucker."_

_            "Wha-what??" Sano choked.  "Takeda told me there were only two guys!  In and out!  I won't tell 'em nuthin', I swear!"_

_            "We gotta do this…sorry, lover."_

_            "No!  No!!"_

_            As Sano curled up into a fetal position, the brothers burst out laughing.  Hajime tossed the man's gun to him and chuckled at his pathetic friend.  Aoshi pulled off his mask and bent to ruffle the younger man's hair._

_            When Sagara noticed that nothing was happening, he opened his eyes and looked around.  No one was there.  Sitting up, his gaze roamed the room and he saw bodies strewn about, as well as the Omitsu brothers tucking their things away in duffel bags._

_            "FUCK!  It was you guys??  …nice work."_

_            Hajime chucked a thumb at the man.  "Look at this rookie motherfucker."_

_            "ROOKIE??"  Stomping towards the wiry man, Sano got in his face.  "Do I look like a fucken rookie to you??  You're no seasoned veteran, dipshit!  You think you have the right to judge me??"_

_            From behind, Aoshi tackled the Sekihoutai runner and got him in a full-Nelson.  Hajime slapped the younger man's ass repeatedly, laughing as he yelped with each blow._

_            "Ow!  OW!  Seriously, that hurts!"_

_            "GET A FUCKEN HOLD OF YOURSELF!!!" roared Hajime with mock sternness._

_            Chuckling, both brothers released him and stalked off._

_            "Clean up this shit," scoffed Brother #1._

_            "Hey, you guys wanna hang at my place for a while?" Sano asked, the argument already forgotten._

_            "Aa," said Brother #2, "you're buying dinner."_

            The soft, sweet voice drifted through the speakers.  "Hi.  This is Omasu outside Golden Leaves Hotel, where a violent and bloody massacre occurred earlier today.  Some of China's top mob lords in a group called the Juppongotana, were congregating yesterday when two men barged in and shot all nine dead.  The police are not releasing any information about the killers, but it is known that they are at large and considered armed, dangerous and most likely have a death wish.  Omasu signing off on Channel Five.  Ciao!"

**_End Notes:  _**"In nomeni patri et fili spiritus sancti" is Latin for "In the name of the father, son and holy spirit."  (Thus, nomeni=name; patri=paternal/father; fili=son; spiritus=spirit; sancti=holy/sanctified)

Lol…Omasu as a news reporter…I keep seeing Ulala saying, "Spaaaaace Channel Five!"  (Those of you _Space Channel Five_ fans will get what I'm saying.  If I could groove like Ulala, DUDE.)

"The queer man" is originally the "fag man" and the officer corrects himself by saying "the fat man."  But since Shishio could never really be considered "fat," I found that remark inappropriate.  :P  Being that Shishio could easily be considered "weird," "queer" seemed to be a good slip to make.  ^o^

I'm afraid that the next update will be slow in coming.  I apologize!  I'm beginning to get hampered with two many projects at once, so I regret to say that this is going to bear a bit of that.  But have no fear…I will complete this story.  Oh yes.  It will be done.  (_Wayne's World _reference!!!)

There are way too many jokes for me to amuse myself with…so without further ado, I'd like to thank everyone who ever gave me encouragement.  ^_^  It is deeply felt.


	7. The Saints Enjoy a Little Rest

**_Writer's Note:  _**Special thankies to Cherry Delight for being full of loving support and energetic emails!  ^_^  I love you!

This chapter took a LONG ass time to get out and a lot of it was due to…um…myself.  Just a bit bogged down with everything.  Apologies to you all!

Hope y'all aren't disappointed with the turn things have taken…

_Mibu Saints _brought to you by Leila's Joy

            "So… anyone that _you _think is bad?" Sano asked in a flat tone.

            "Well…yeah," shrugged Hajime.  "Why not?"

            "Because it's psychotic!"

            The boys were seated at a card table in some grungy apartment.  Their case of money was open and several stacks were lying across the table.

            There was a knock at the door.

            Very quickly, they stuffed the money into hiding and took up their weapons.  Aoshi approached the door and swung it open, holding his handgun straight ahead of him.

            "Oh, thank God," Megumi breathed.  Heedless of the barrel pointed at her forehead, she rushed forward into the arms of her blue-eyed man.

            Shocked, he held her with one arm and swept the hallway with his trigger hand.  "Goddammit," he cursed, pulling Tokio in by the sleeve.  "What are you two doing here?"

            Meg lifted her face from the front of his shirt and peered up at him.  "We thought you boys might do something stupid after you got out of that jail.  Me and Tokio went by your place and when you guys weren't there, we thought we'd try Sano's."

            The younger man scratched his scruff uncomfortably.  "Actually, this is my girlfriend's place."

            "Fucken freeloader," scoffed Hajime.

            Tokio blinked in the poor lighting.  "From the looks of things, I'd say Megumi was right.  What do you need guns for?"

            The silence and exchange of looks was long and uneasy.

            Sano gestured to the ratty couch.  "Um…maybe you ladies should have a seat.  I'm having a hard time undertanding this, too."

            Sitting between the women, the young fighter watched as the Omitsu Brothers set and straddled chairs in front of them.

            "Hajime," Tokio began sternly, "this had better be good."

            Her significant other leaned an arm on the backrest and smirked slightly at his brother.  "Me and Aoshi have decided it is time to punish the wicked for their transgressions."

            "And to do that," Aoshi said, "death is the only option."  To emphasize his point, he snapped a fresh clip into his pistol and felt its weight.

            Megumi gasped, tears springing in her eyes.  "But Aoshi…you can't just go around killing people, even if they are bad men!"  A hand flew to cover her mouth in sudden revelation.  "Oh my god…you're not going to…to me, are you?  I've fornicated!!"

            Amused, Aoshi gingerly flexed his fingers before moving to sit at her feet.  Meg's hand was lying on her lap and he curled his fingers around her soft palm.  "Megumi…you do not think that makes you a bad person, do you?"

            "I…suppose not."

            Bringing her hand to his lips, he kissed it gently and rubbed the back of her hand against his cheek.  "But you're still sexy as sin."

            Meg grinned.  "Only the best for my little devil."

            "Oh, puke!" growled Hajime, "You two should just get a fucken room!  Go at it like bunnies like you always do!"

            Turning to glare at his brother, Aoshi retaliated darkly, "Just shut up, Hajime!"

            Through the tension between the twins, Tokio watched them silently, her hands primly in her lap.  "I don't understand…you want to kill people…for good?  I think I'm going to be sick."

            "No," Saitou answered.  "The only thing that's _sick _is good men going home to their families…they turn on the news…know what they see?  Child molesters, murderers…rapists—they're all getting out of prison."

            Aoshi's angered voice joined in.  "Mafiosos…getting caught with twenty kilos…getting out on bail…same fucking day."

            "And you know what everyone's thinking?" Hajime mused.

            "Someone should just kill those motherfuckers."

            "Kill them all.  Admit it, even you've thought about it," smirked Hajime.

            There was a long, dragged out silence that followed.

            "…you guys should be in every major city…"  Sano said at last.

            Suddenly standing up, Megumi wrenched her hand from Aoshi's.  "No!  I won't be a part of this!  You all need help!"

            Her blue-eyed man stepped in front of her.  "Meg, stop."

            "I'm in _nursing_ school right now.  Does that mean anything to you?"  She dodged the hand he tried to place on her shoulder.  "God, Aoshi!  I can't even believe you'd say something like that!  What about…this?" she asked, her hand sliding along the metal cross laying against his chest.  "What about your faith?"

            "The laws of God are higher than those of man."

            Before Meg could react to his words, Tokio's body convulsed violently on the couch next to Sano.  Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as the muscle spasms caused her form to sag to the floor.  Everyone rushed to the woman's side, her breathing was already frantic.

            Hajime was about to lift her head to keep it away from the floor and couch edge when Tokio jerked into a sitting position and grabbed the unsuspecting man's turtleneck by the shoulders.  An unearthly voice seemed to choke out of her small body, sending shivers through the woman's muscles and making the temperature in the room drop ten degrees.

            "_Never shall innocent blood be shed…yet the blood…of the wicked shall flow like a river.  The Three shall spread…their blackened wings…and be the vengeful, striking hammer of God._"

            As though with great effort, Tokio's entire body tensed and breath left her as the Voice did.  Immediately, she sucked in a great gulp of air as though it were the first time she had breathed in ages, her chest expanding with every gasp.  Sweat had beaded on her forehead; her pale lips were cracked against her gray complexion and slowly, her pupils came back.  She was shivering when Hajime put his arms around her, still stunned to have his girlfriend whack out on him.

            Megumi retrieved a blanket and draped it over her shaken friend.

            "Ha.jime.  I'm so cold," Tokio managed to rasp.  "Keep me safe.  Please…"

*

Two Hours Later That Night

            "Are you sure your girlfriend won't mind us all being here?" Meg asked.

            "Christ," Sano said.  "That woman's on every drug known to man."

            It was a somber evening as everyone gathered around the table for pizza.  Hajime had stayed close by Tokio's side after her episode and the woman was being uncharacteristically quiet.  No one had spoken of the incident.

            "By the way…" Aoshi wondered.  "Where is she?"

            Sano let out a breath.  "Who the fuck knows?  Probably blowing some guy for coke.  If only she's blow me, ya know?"

            Megumi and Aoshi sat near each other, but did not interact much.  It was as though they couldn't stand talking to each other but at the same time, couldn't bear the idea of not being within touching distance, should anything go down.

            Meg rolled her eyes at his coarseness.  "Oh yuck.  You're so disgusting, Sano."

            "She's a deep-throater, what can I say?"

            "You can shut your fucking mouth in a lady's presence, cockface!"  Hajime snarled nastily. 

            Aoshi watched as the two men continued to squabble.  He became increasingly aware of his girlfriend's sluggishness.  The half-eaten slice of pizza stopped on its way to her mouth and slipped entirely from her fingers.  Her head slumped groggily onto his shoulder and he found himself having a hard time containing the small smile tugging at his lips.  It was hard to stay mad at the little vixen.

            "DAMMIT," roared Sano, slamming his fists on the table, "STOPE BEING SUCH A—"  A deafening shot suddenly rang through the room and blood splattered against the wall in a heavy spray.

            Meg jumped at the sound just as Aoshi tackled her to the floor and covered her slight frame with his.  Hajime pulled the shell-shocked Tokio beneath the windows and hugged her to him.  Sano was busy screaming at the top of his lungs and knocking chairs over.

            "HOLY FUCK!!  OMIGOD!  SHIT!  WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED??"

            Aoshi looked up from his position on the floor at the blood on the wall.  "I can't believe that just happened."

            From beneath him, Meg lifted her head to get a look at the tufts of fur still floating to the tiled floor.  "…you shot her cat?"

            "I didn't shoot anyone!" the fighter denied, shaking his head.  "…Is it…is it dead?"

            Hajime's nostrils flared, never a good sign.  "Is it dead?  There's fucken blood all over the wall and you want to know if it's dead??  OF COURSE IT'S FUCKEN DEAD!!!  YOU FUCKING SHOT IT!!!"

            The woman in his arms stirred at the sound of his heated voice.  Her glassy eyes almost seemed to focus as she lifted a hand and brushed them against his lips.

            He blew out a frustrated breath.  "Christ.  You are such a fucking moron."

            Megumi thought she was so mad at him…and yet, feeling his big, strong hands softly stroking her hair…

            They were hands that were capable of murder, that had already taken life.  She found it so hard to believe that he could be so gentle with her…as though he was content to stay like that with her forever.

            _I would be happy if you stayed with me forever…_

            Meg squirmed beneath him until she had rolled onto her back to face Aoshi.  She could feel their clothes catching and pulling at each other with every inch that she slid against him.  Still a little high from the adrenaline rush, Megumi stretched her fingers up his ribcage, enjoying the feel of each ridge along the way.  Her lips curved into a sexy smile.

            "Mmmm…you know, Oshi-chan," she said, "I'm not mad at you."

            Her hair fell in a wild cascade against the floor, all pitch black and gossamer.  How he loved her hair.  He only shook his head, allowing his bangs to fall and sway over her.

            She purred against him.  "I had no idea my man was so gallant…"

            Aoshi knit his brows in confusion.

            "Oh yes…you must be the most gallant man I know!"  Cupping his cheeks with her slender hands, Meg scrunched her nose daintily and playfully shook his face.  "Quite a brave thing that you did, love."

            He was smirking now, his eyes gazing directly into her brown ones.  "Brave?"

            She was still a little dizzy from the sudden drop in latitudes and she deliberately inhaled to bring their bodies that much closer.  "Yes, brave, my valiant soldier!"  Unable to bear simply toying with him any longer, Megumi pulled him by the neck and eagerly kissed him.  How could he resist kissing her back with fervor?  He could not.

            "Mmm…you smell so good…" she hummed.

            Aoshi broke away after awhile and nuzzled his nose against her ear.  "You would look so good in red satin right now…my minx.  Think of all the different ways…"

            Sano gaped at them.  "God!  Do I really not exist to you guys??  Holy shit!"

            "Try to stay awake while he fucks you this time!" glared Hajime.

            Aoshi merely ignored them and went back to tonguing his girlfriend while giving everyone else the finger.

            From within the circle of Hajime's arms, Tokio raised her head and seemed to focus on the couple rubbing against each other.

            "Eww!  Yuck!" her voice boomed out of nowhere.  "Were they sex talking in front of us the whole time??  What the fuck?"

            Hajime was startled by the woman's sudden moment of clarity.  He shifted her body to look at her face.  In a matter of hours, her eyes had grown old.  They had a haunted look, wide and vacant and no longer innocent.  He brushed her cheek with his long fingers.

            "Hajime…what's wrong?" her concern wrapped its tendrils around his senses.

            But he only slid his hand to the back of her head and rubbed the tender flesh there.

            Tokio clasped the front of his shirt in earnest.  "Are you okay, Hajime?  You're not hurt, are you?"

            "Tokio…" he said in a quiet voice, pulling her closer to rest his forehead on hers.  "It's my turn to worry about you, now."

            "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON??" Sano bellowed.  "ARE YOU GUYS ALL TURNING INTO COMPLETE PUSSIES SUDDENLY??  WHAT THE _FUCK_?"  When silence only answered him, he kicked a chair into the table.  "Fuck you guys, I'm going to bed!"

*

The Next Morning

            Sano padded into the living room, a new pair of khaki slacks on his strong legs with a crisp, white shirt, which he was buttoning up at the moment.

            He looked at Megumi and Aoshi asleep on the carpetbag LAZ-E-BOY.  Aoshi's chin resting against his chest, his eyes lightly closed and his hair falling forward.  Meg was strewn across his lap, her legs thrown over an arm of the chair.  Her long hair and head were cradled against his shoulder.

            _Hm.  Glad they were able to keep their clothes on last night_, Sano thought bitterly.  He turned his attention to the other couple sleeping soundly against the couch.  Hajime was sitting on the nappy carpet, his back leaning against the lower part of the couch and his head thrown back against the cushion.  The front of Tokio's body was pressed completely against Hajime's side, her head resting in the crook of his shoulder.  One hand had curled its fingers around his rosary and lightly caressed the beads.

            Sano's eyes were drawn to a very male hand slipped casually into the back pocket of Tokio's jeans.  Turning to go, he stubbed his toe on a desk and bit back all the good curses he knew.  When he glanced back, he saw that Aoshi and Hajime were watching him with narrow eyes.

            "I'm going out," Sano murmured.

            Gently, Aoshi lifted Meg and slipped out from underneath her so that he could follow the young fighter out the door.

*

            They were walking through the apartment's parking lot, the walls lined with bricks.  The sun was beginning to warm up and chase away shadows.

            "No…it's not true," Sano said, tightening the tie in his red bandana.  "They need me."

            Aoshi slipped into his black overcoat.  "Think about it.  They send you in there and…" he let his voice trail off.

            Sano stopped and fixed Aoshi with narrowed eyes.  "You don't think they set me up, do you?"

            The brother's silence told him what he needed to know.

            "No…he wouldn't do that to me!  They need me!"

            "He?" Aoshi raised a questioning eyebrow.

            "Papa Sou!  He told me…"

            "Sano.  You had a fucking six-shooter.  You think they _didn't _know there were nine men in that room?"

            "He told me two guys, in and out!"

            Aoshi's low, careful voice suddenly rose.  "He told you what you needed to know!"  He paused to regain his composure.  "Listen.  He had to of known you were going to get the big guy…maybe one other, but he knew you weren't getting out of there alive."

            "I'm the funny man!"

            Aoshi only stared at him impassively.

            "Goddammit!"  Sano kicked the brick wall next to him.  "I've been working for that bastard since I was a kid…doing his _dirty _work…getting him coffee, sandwiches, newspapers…fuck, I even did that backstabbers _laundry_!"

            The young fighter paced frantically.  "This was supposed to be my big break!  I'm one of _them_, goddammit!"

            "You don't know for sure if they sold you out…but there's a very good chance."

            "If I find out that I was double crossed…I'm gonna track that fucker down and he can just suck my pathetic dick!  …And I'll even dip it in wasabi so the sick motherfucker can get a taste of home while he's at it!"

            Hajime was walking toward them now, his strides long and purposeful.  "Did you tell him?" he asked his brother.

            "Of course," Aoshi replied.

            "Well then, what the fuck?"

            Sano looked at him with annoyance.  "What?"

            Hajime pointed a finger accusingly.  "You're going back to the goddamn Sekihoutai, aren't you!  I can tell!  Stupid sonuvabitch, they want you _dead_!  Are you _dense_??"

            "Hey!  I'm just heading to the coffeeshop downtown, that's all!"

            Hajime's eyes flashed before he gripped the younger man by the lapels of his shirt.  "You stupid _fuck_, you're going to your goddamn Sekihoutai diner!  Is it so hard to believe they don't care about you??"

            Sano shook him free.  "Fuck it.  I'm leaving."  Over his shoulder he yelled, "And bury the fucken cat!"

            Hajime bellowed at his retreating back, "Fine!  Don't come cryin' to us when no one goes to your funeral, ya dumb _fuck_!"  In frustration, he kicked the shit out of the wall.  "Fuck!"

*

            The girls were awake when the brothers came in.  They cleaned up the bloodstains together and Hajime dug a grave in a little patch of dirt next to the parking lot.  There, they held a small ceremony for the feline who had not suffered before passing on to the next life.  Hajime's eulogy went as follows:

            "You were fucking cat…but you died with dignity," before making an offering of cigarette ashes.

*

            And God…despite popular belief, welcomed his child into his kingdom.

*

**_End Notes:  _***cough*  A slightly _different _track than the movie took.  Lol.  I kept bursting out in giggling fits when writing, so I hope that it shows.

Lol…I was thinking about that _Simpons _episode where the minister tells Lisa that Snowball will not go to Heaven because pets aren't allowed.  Jerks.

I love how things get all sappy and romantic and then reality hits and it's like, 'Oh yeah…there are other people in the room…"

Anyway.  THIS IS MY UPDATE!!!  ^_^  Ah…feels so good.

4-16-04


	8. The Saints and Their Fuckup Friend

_**Writer's Note: **_Haha, as always, special thanks to Cherry Delight, whom I promised to update during the summer and whose promise I totally broke (by three months)!!! Sorry, girl! Sometimes, you oughtta give this writer a tough time! Crack down hard on me!

I am not wholly happy with this chapter, but there's not much else I can do about it. Do let me know what you weren't hot about. Odds, are, I wasn't so hot about it either.

_**Where the Story Left Off: **_(What you may have missed due to the writer's lack of timely updates) The women show up at the apartment and Tokio suffers from some unknown possession that encourages the men to continue their moral cleansing. Both couples share moments of stolen "together" time and in the morning, Sano departs for the Sekihoutai's known hangout, to find out for sure if he was set up. (And the kitty was given a burial complete with eulogy)

:::l:::

**_Mibu Saints  
_**by Leila Winters  
"_The Saints and Their Fuck-up Friend_"

:::l:::

**A Short Time Later...  
**They were waiting. The brothers sitting at the table, staring at the phone sitting in the center while their respective girlfriends stood behind them, ruffling their hair and massaging their shoulders. In the next room, Sano's girlfriend and another woman were sitting on the couch, still junked up from the previous night.

RING!

Aoshi leapt to grab the receiver, pouncing upon it with the fury and dangerous grace of a leopard intent on catching a mouse.

"Hello?"

Hajime motioned for him to give him the phone. His request was scathingly ignored.

"Are you okay?"

Pissed, Hajime snatched the phone from his brother's clutches and held the receiver to his ear.

"What'd you do, shit-for-brains?"

Aoshi was visibly irritated and stopped glaring only when Megumi wrapped her arms around his shoulders in a tender embrace.

"Fuck ya calling for, then?"

Hajime's narrow face, though harsh and planed normally, scrunched up in disgust. "Fine. But you get the feeling that something's not quite right, you get your pathetic little ass out of there quick, got it, dickface?"

He hung up the phone to see Tokio shaking beside him.

Concerned, he pulled her onto his lap and rubbed the muscles in her shoulders with his calloused palms, his eyes searching her old ones.

"Hey baby, what's wrong?"

She gave a tearful sniff and crinkled her nose in that too-cute way.

"It's Sano..."

"What?? What are you doing, thinking of that fucking asshole??"

"Hajime..."

"No! I want to know! What's that moron doing being on your fucking mind?"

Megumi's nostrils flared. "Stop yelling at her!"

"Shinomori, you better put a collar on that wild pussy of yours, she speaks when she's not spoken to."

"Prick!"

"_Brother_." Aoshi's jaw ground menacingly at his opponent. "Do refrain from making snide remarks about my girlfriend."

"I'll say what I fucking want!"

"Talk about her like that again—"

"Oh, I'm so fucking scared, Shinomori—"

"Sano—"

"—sounds like you wanna kick my ass—"

"I will not stoop to your level—!!"

"C'mon guys, stop—"

"—bet you don't wanna show your inner beast to Meg—"

"—don't fucking say it—"

"—he's in trouble...he's—"

"He's just trying to bait you, Aoshi—!"

"Still listening to your goddamn hussy??"

"HAJIME—!"

_"Can't you all feel it??"  
_  
Aoshi stopped, hands on his brother's throat, body halfway across the table. Hajime turned startled eyes on his girlfriend, momentarily forgetting his attempts to break his brother's hold. Megumi had both arms around Aoshi's waist, trying in vain to keep him in his seat.

Tokio covered her ears with shaking hands. "Can't you feel it in the air? Sano needs to watch his back."

**Shortly After...  
**"Holy fucking shit, we have to get out of here!!" Sano burst through the door and started stuffing everything he could into whatever bags were nearby. "Shit shit shit! Pack your shit! Pack your shit!!"

**In Front of the Imperial Cafe  
Payphone  
**"Hello?"

"Aoshi, that you? How is everyone?" Sano scratched at the scruff on his chin while looking cautiously about him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah—yeah! I just—"

"What'd you do, shit-for-brains?" Hajime's angry tone lashed out through the receiver.

"Fuck! Nothing! Put Aoshi back on!"

"Fuck ya calling for, then?"

Sano felt his patience cracking. "Dammit, Hajime...can't a guy check in? I'm not doing anything."

"Fine. But you get the feeling that something's not quite right, you get your pathetic little ass out of there quick, got it, dickface?"

"I got it, I got it. Shit, you're worse than Tokio; downright softy. Catch ya on the flip side."

He hung up the phone and slipped on a pair of sunglasses. Upon entering the Imperial Cafe, he noticed Old General, the barkeep, staring at him wide-eyed. Unperturbed, Sano continued on his way to a booth in the back, where his two buddies, Shiro and Katsu sat.

Shiro patted him on the back. "Hey, Sano! We heard. Awesome, just awesome."

Katsu gave his friend a solemn look. "Sorry, man. This morning, Takeda came in shooting his mouth off. Old General over there gave him a drink on the house."

Sano's brows furrowed. "Wait a minute. You guys knew?"

Shiro laughed and punched at his arm. "Knew? Shit, we were in on it! But we did what we were supposed to! We layed low and kept our mouths shut! You did your part."

"Katsu?"

But his friend looked away. "I'm really sorry, Sano."

Shiro was all but dancing in his seat. "Hell yes! We're in for sure! Now Papa Sou knows we're true Sekihoutai! Goddamn!"

Sano was quietly stewing. "Christ. Next you're gonna tell me the General was in on it."

Shiro's eyes were wide, "The General? That fucker knew before we did..."

His teeth were grinding painfully against each other. Katsu threw him a curious look. Reaching a hand into his coat, Sano pulled a pistol from an interior pocket.

"Now wait a minute, Sano—" Shiro began.

The young fighter fired two shots into the other man's chest. There were screams from the other patrons as they bid hasty retreats and made a rush for the door.

Katsu turned pained eyes on his friend as he came face to face with a .35 mm barrel. "Listen—Sano—I'm sorry. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I-I wanted to tell you, 'swear to it."

Sano looked at his long-time buddy for several seconds. He could feel his bottom lip and lower jaw threatening to droop. He hated to do it. He fucking _hated _it.

_'But you didn't.'_

He pulled the trigger.

And of course, there was the General, backing up at Sano's approach. "I didn't have anything to do with it! I just work here! You hear me? _I just work here_!!"

But the young man was far from listening to the pleas of a traitor. "You thought that was pretty funny, huh? Me busting my ass and then getting set up. Maybe it was your idea in the first place!!"

He shot round after round into the General's portly belly until there were no more and then some. His pistol clicked several times before he realized there was blood on his face.

"Shit—!"

And he ran.

:::l:::

"Pack your shit!!!"

Sano proceeded to knock things over in his attempt to get his things together, the ruckus effectively frightening the women, who stayed back as the boys went to investigate.

Hajime gave the younger man a swift kick to the butt for emphasis. "Calm the fuck down. Tell us what happened."

"What happened?? 'fuck you think happened?? They set me up! They'll be after me next, I know it! Let's get the fuck out of here before—"

"SANO!!!"

A woman and his girlfriend, Sayo, were sitting on the couch, both looking a bit bedraggled and worse for wear. Sano made his way over to her without any fuss and asked imploringly of his woman, "What is it now, bitch?"

The woman's eyes glazed for a second as she stroked a lock of her brown, straggly hair. "Um...where's my cat, Sano?"

He grit his teeth and forced a smile. "Your cat? I killed your cat, you druggie whore." At her gasp, he continued to mock her with a slight bow. "I thought it would bring closure to our relationship."

Sniffling and fighting back tears, she looked up at him with large, moist eyes. "You...you killed my—my—"

"Your _what_?" Sano growled.

"My...uh..."

"Your _what_??" he yelled, a booted foot slamming into the base of the couch. "I swear to God--"

"Sano, no!"

Too late. Already he had the pistol out and the barrel against his temple. "I'll shoot myself! You can tell me your cat's goddamn name, bitch!"

"S-Skippee!!" she sqeaked.

Sayo's companion sat up bravely beside her and pointed an accusing finger at the perpetrator. "Stop yelling at her, prick!"

Sano looked at the woman and almost slapped her in the face. "Shut your goddamn mouth! I can't go out to get a pack of cigarettes without running into nine guys you _fucked_!"

Megumi buried her face in her boyfriend's shoulder in mortification as he ushered her out the door, following close behind, duffel over a shoulder.

Hajime grabbed his own bag and tossed the money case to Tokio, whereupon they proceeded to vacate the premises.

Sayo gave a last whimper at Sano's retreating form. "But S-Sano...I lo-ove you!"

But he only closed the door with a forceful click.

"Fuck you!!!"

:::l:::

Meg smacked the young fighter on the back of the head with the flat of her palm. "Dick!"

"What the fuck was that for??"

They were surrounding the four-door, ready to pile in when someone thought of a plan of action.

The woman looked at Sano in fury, nearly shaking with the heat of her emotions. "Don't ever call a woman a whore again as long as you live, understand me?"

"Aw, c'mon, Fox."

She gave him the middle finger in response. "Fuck you, Sano. You can call us all the ugly names in the world and the best we can do is call you a bastard. You have no right to judge women."

Tokio glared from the other side of the car. "She deserved better."

"Who? Sayo? That skanky—"

SMACK!

The young man recoiled from the blow and held a hand to his stinging cheek.

Megumi pointed an angry finger. "Get.in.the.fucking.car."

"Holy shit, you're really pissed."

Hajime said nothing and slipped behind the wheel, Tokio getting in behind him.

After looking at the expression of supreme bitchiness on Meg's face, Sano straightened out and said, "Look, I'm sorry. Can we drop it? Jesus, when I think about what I did to...We need to get out of here." He slipped into the middle seat in the back. "Broad-fucking daylight too..."

Aoshi studied the look on his girlfriend's face for a moment. "Are you all right?"

She blinked viciously at the moistness in her eyes. "Yeah, sorry."

He waited for her to continue, pulling her closer and stroking the side of her face.

"I've been called names since I've been growing up. I'm sick of it."

He kissed her lingeringly on the cheek and was about to offer the customary words of encouragement when the sudden blare of a horn startled both out of their private world.

Hajime glared at the two. "You guys gonna make out all day or are you getting in the fucking car?"

:::l:::

Sano frantically hit the back of Hajime's headrest. "Stop the car! Stop the fucking car!"

It must have been sheer force of will that kept the volatile man from strangling the young fighter. Still, he called the vehicle to a stop, if only to stop the infernal pounding on his chair.

"Here! Here! Dude, that fucking asshole Takeda goes here all the time!"

Tokio shuddered beside him. "He goes to the Sin Bin?"

"I bet you it was that skeazy fuck who put the hit out on me. He's always had it in for me." The light dawned on the young man's face and he gesticulated in his excitement. "I know everything about Takeda! I know where he eats, where he sleeps, I know who he's fucking. Papa Sou lets me handle some of his biggest lackeys. I know where they are at any given time. I got phone numbers, I got addresses, I got their vacation homes and mistresses." An unnatural spark hit his eyes. "We could kill everyone."

For a moment, no one uttered a word. For the girls, it was a stupefied silence.

"Yeah, except that's the dumbest thing I have ever heard, Sanosuke!" Megumi growled.

In turn, the young man felt obligated to defend himself. "It is not! Guys? What do you think? Hajime? C'mon..."

The brother merely stroked a chin thoughtfully and said, "I'm strangely comfortable with it."

"HAH!" Sano exploded smugly to the women. "They're all about punishing the wicked and shit. See?"

Aoshi smiled slightly at his friend's stupidity. "It felt good, didn't it?"

"Yeah...strange enough, it did."

:::l:::

_**End Notes: **_Okay, hopefully, back on track with events and sorry for some of the melodrama. I hope to bring in other elements for the next chapter. Ack! I can't take all the tension! Maybe I'll just totally change the tone and make it light. I'm not cut out for action!

10-3-04


End file.
